How Odd

I feel okay today.

I wanted to write something profound. But I am sitting here and nothing comes to mind, nothing I want to write about. I did try and finish something I had started, but the words just weren't there. Drawing a blank.

Why is it that I have no problem writing when I feel depressed? The words just seem to flow out of me. But when I don't feel so bad I can't think of anything to write about? The words are blocked. Is my brain so messed up that I only have thoughts and feelings when I am depressed? Or is this part of it? That when I don't feel depressed it is just my mind shutting down? Is it just another aspect of the depression, my brain trying to trick me into thinking I am feeling okay? How odd, I guess I just need to think of something that makes me sad.

This is almost fun, trying to figure out my head. Like I am playing a game with my brain, it's to bad the brain is winning right now.